I know that it is a bit silly to be writing a wrap up post halfway into the month, but the last few weeks have been blissfully crazy and I am sure that when I look back I will see these months as one of the most important turning points of my life.
In August 2021, three of my friends left the country to pursue their post graduate studies abroad, and it felt like a wake up call.
Don’t get me wrong, I have been perfectly happy with my life all this time. I may not have been where I imagined I would be, but I was holding down a job that made me happy and paid me enough in a time when so many people are still struggling to make ends meet. I had recovered from a relationship that was more disappointing than heartbreaking in the way it ended, and had began talking to someone who might be a ‘maybe’. I was healthy and happy and satisfied.
But at the same time, I felt like I was just existing. I have spent my whole life trying to climb to the next highest place, reaching for the next achievement that can make my parents proud. And I didn’t realize how exhausting such a life could be until I turned 25 and realized that instead of trying to make myself happy, I was constantly worrying over whether I had made my parents happy.
Life is too short to waste trying to get someone else’s validation. And once I realized that, I also realized that I had no idea what I wanted to do next. So I was sort of floating by, with no direction or purpose.
When my friends left for their post graduate studies though, it felt like I was finally waking up from a dream. I had a moment of epiphany: I was 25 years old, I had over a year of work experience and decent grades, my father would be retiring and I still had a long way till I could be fully independent.
That’s when I decided that I was going to prepare to complete my studies abroad.
Obviously, a sudden decision like this meant that priorities had to be changed, which is why I ended up neglecting my blog here and couldn’t read any books much either. But I am okay with that. Right now, the next step is more important.
It took me a while to get things sorted out, and I am still at the very initial stages. The past few months mostly flew by making the prerequisite preparations. But that doesn’t mean it was all work and no play.
During August, I ticked off a personal goal that had been pending for a while now. I complete my beginner’s certification for Google Analytics, something I have always wanted to do once I began my career in digital marketing. It was tough, I am not gonna lie and the Google Analytics Advanced course is even harder, but I am going to finish that before the end of this year too, and maybe get my GAIQ test done as well.
September was an amazing and memorable month full of many “first times”. For the first time, I watched as my friend got married and started a whole new chapter of her life. Words are not enough to describe how I felt watching her say ‘Kobul’ and accept the love of her life as her husband and partner forevermore. I will definitely be sharing another huge blog post about this another time, because I have way too many things to say about that night.
I also went on a trip with my coworkers to Tanguar Haor, and it was epic! I have never seen skies so picturesque, or such beautiful blue waters. Again, I am going to need to write a whole seperate blog post to talk about my trip, but suffice to say I am always going to remember these moments.
In summary, the past few months have given me a lot of things to look back on and be grateful for. And I wanted to share that here, partly because I want to remember these moments and also because I have been feeling that itch to return to my safe zone and share what’s on my mind and just get it off my chest.
Ahh, i’m happy you got this realization and are now working toward this goal 💕
Goodluck, I wish you all the best!
I totally understand.. for a while I was panicking at just that – existing. I, too, don’t really have money problems.. but let’s say I couldn’t go live on my own with what I earn with my two dogs (and let’s not talk about how insane appartment prices are! absolutely too pricey for things that aren’t even properly made and looks like dumbs..) ; eventually it just passed.
Hi Kristina! Ahh yes apartment prices are crazy where I live too; I am not gonna lie, I would struggle a bit if I moved out of my parent’s home, something I have considered several times. I am earning enough to be comfortable, but sometimes I do look at my friends who are more successful and I feel like an absolute failure. I know that’s not the right mindset to have, I should be focusing on my own improvement and celebrate my own achievements, and I am trying to do that right now but it’s hard when the brown aunties keep comparing. 😅
Thank you for visiting and for your kind words; you always make me feel a little less alone with your thoughtful comments. Sending hugs to you and your furbabies 💜💜
Ahh im happy my words make you feel better 🥰
Yes, not comparing with others is very hard indeed.. though iknow it’s best for me not to get my own place until i’m with someone despite the cost, just because I can’t stay alone for too long… it really peaks up my depression and I don’t like it 😅